Don't turn the world over

Michael Brown seems to be all the rage these days.  Meaning that the rage of parts of the country are being collected in a small suburb of a big city.  Michael Brown seems to be deceased  because he was doing something that is outside of the realm of good character.  His killer may not be innocent but the large boy isn't innocent either.  He seems to be famous because his friend and accomplice lied about how he was behaving.  Facts and other people's perspectives may turn out to be very stubborn for Michael Brown's side kick.

But alas, I don't care about that.  I don't care that a kid might die.  I don't even worry about innocent kids dying all that much.  And I don't think that those people are who are protesting, looting, and rioting do either.  Because I know several cops.  Most cops are decent people who don't want to shoot ever.  We all know cops.  Or should.  We all know someone who wears a badge in order to serve and protect.  We know that most, 90%, 80%, 95% are good men and women of high character.  We know that the protesting, looting, and rioting are in some way telling the world that they are not most that way.

Granted some cops are evil.  The majority are not but let's at least entertain the ev
il in a handful of cops as a possibility.  Well prosecute those cops one at a time.  But cops are not bad.  A cop may be bad one time.  But people who are looting, rioting, and protesting are telling their children black and white subconsciously that cops are evil. Stop it.  You're turning the world upside down.

Don't believe cops are good?  The instigation of violence that has been done of the streets of MO this week has taken the patience of Job to not respond to.  I submit to you that the only reason you feel safe to riot and loot is because you know that cops are good.  Otherwise you'd try other tactics that might not get you killed for 'peacefully protesting.'  If they do end up shooting at someone because they have a gun, things may get really messy but not because they're bad, it's because the bad are instigating evil and they want the cops to react badly.  That is not their nature even if it's one of their natures.

Don't believe you're teaching your children badly?  Everyone needs to make it clear to their kids if they're heading to Ferguson or if they're watching or blogging or whatever, that cops are good.  Don't teach them that if you're black you have to act meek around cops because of their structural racism.  Don't teach them that it's the cops being racist that started this.  Don't teach them that it's wrong for cops to stop more blacks than whites.  Teach them that cops are supposed to serve and protect and God willing they will.   Teach them that goodness and innocence aren't the enemies of police but that evil and hate are their foes.  Don't teach them they use oppression but they fight oppression.  The more we honor and respect the 90% true the closer we can push it to 100%.  For if you teach that something that almost never happens is the truth then you'll have a world that believes in the upside down world.

Don't turn the world over.  It's impossible to walk.  Don't turn the world over.  It's impossible to walk.  The world becomes less navigable when it’s upside down.  The truth looks wrong when your worldview is upside down.  When you see an unarmed man shot in an upside down world you might leap to the conclusion that the cop was racist or that the protesters are protesting the military tactics of the police.  Pretty soon there is no justice and no peace BECAUSE hundreds or thousands are traveling to the city to say there isn't.

Prospero meets Jesus

This last month I've been preparing to present a lesson plan for teaching the Tempest by William Shakespeare.  The Tempest was his last solo written play and sort of his second tear of critical acclaim.  No one dies at the end so it leaves the audience a little bored.  It's about finding the power to forgive thine enemies so Hollywood hates it.  It is my favorite Shakespeare play because I didn't feel compelled to read it. 

Oh...Enlightenment Burn!!!  Ouch.  

Truth be told I've never been all together thrilled with any of the Bard's plays although I'd like to improve my working knowledge of them so that I can do better on Jeopardy.  I know the language is beautiful and life-affirming.  I know that the plays are a way to connect to our ancient past but so is reading the King James Bible.  The plots are just so tedious.  There is never any arc in any characters.  Take A Comedy of Errors; the play is about mistaken identity and the climax is telling everyone there are two different twins!!!  It's stupid. Or let's make Much Ado About Nothing, Hero is accused of an affair without proof and exonerated without any either.  Is it any wonder that in almost every play the bad guy is the only one with depth.  In the tragedies everyone dies and nobody cares.

But alas, allow me to talk about Prospero.  The Duke of Milan removed from power by his brother and king, sentenced to be banished and thought to have died at sea.  He was even sacrificed with his daughter Miranda.  He survives to become the plucky dictator of a beautiful sandy paradise ruling over the lives of spirits and slaves with an iron fist.  Why was Prospero banished?  Can you believe he spent too much time reading?  He read too many books so the king and his brother usurped his throne because of an overabundance of learning.  The play is the situation of the chance for Prospero to take revenge.  Hang on a tick.  You're telling me that he got sent afloat in the sea because he read too much?  That seems excessive.  Did anyone try to tell him to cut back.  I thought reading made a man smarter and a better ruler.  Doesn't it?  I would think reading made him wise.  Didn't it.

    

Ah but you see Jesus in the book of Ecclesiasticus has an explanation that might explain what got Prospero kicked to the curb.    

Look at this passage from Ecclesiasticus 19
²⁰ The fear of the Lord is all wisdom; and in all wisdom is the performance of the law, and the knowledge of his omnipotency. ²¹ If a servant say to his master, I will not do as it pleaseth thee; though afterward he do it, he angereth him that nourisheth him. ²² The knowledge of wickedness is not wisdom, neither at any time the counsel of sinners prudence. ²³ There is a wickedness, and the same an abomination; and there is a fool wanting in wisdom. ²⁴ He that hath small understanding, and feareth God, is better than one that hath much wisdom, and transgresseth the law of the most High. ²⁵ There is an exquisite subtlety, and the same is unjust; and there is one that turneth aside to make judgment appear; and there is a wise man that justifieth in judgment. ²⁶ There is a wicked man that hangeth down his head sadly; but inwardly he is full of deceit, ²⁷ casting down his countenance, and making as if he heard not: where he is not known, he will do thee a mischief before thou be aware. ²⁸ And if for want of power he be hindered from sinning, yet when he findeth opportunity he will do evil. ²⁹ A man may be known by his look, and one that hath understanding by his countenance, when thou meetest him. ³⁰ A man's attire, and excessive laughter, and gait, show what he is.

From Prospero's learning the occult we got a fantastical play that allows for some amazing costumes an makeup.  Metaphysics run throughout the play whether purposefully or accidentally.  The play has strong images for post colonialism because Prospero really is a dictator to his single simple-minded slave and a terrible spirit that maybe the sequel's star.  The Duke of Milan is knowledgeable in the occult.  However the law of the Lord brings wisdom.  Prospero is in prison, imprisoning the world around him, even unto his own daughter who thankfully the rowboat cast into the sea.  Prospero wreaks vengeance with his hand of power over the world unable to see the hand of God on his. 

But like all Shakespeare characters he might have a little redemption.  He might choose life and be set free.  He may get the key to his own prison of hate and fear right after he lets everyone else out.

Prospero knows all there is to know about potions and magic.  But he doesn't know God.  The West is having trouble knowing God these days.  We've been to the moon but it's been a while since we've been to the interiors of our hearts and found wisdom.  We can put all the libraries in the world on a computer the size of a...filing cabinet.  Only now we put much more than just books on those memory holders so a filing cabinet may not do.  But the big-ness, some might say the glory of God fits not a thumb drive the size of the universe.  The world we know more about than we ever have but less about who made it.  

Now trust me I know how difficult it can be to say that wisdom belongs to the creationist than to Stephen Hawking.  But Jesus says it's true.  Guess what Prospero and Shakespeare make the claim as well.  All the knowledge one can attain may not be a way out but a way into a prison of the mind.

Ramen Noodles and Occupy Wall Street

Remember Occupy Wall Street?  That group of capitalist-hating hippies that thought they’d be allowed to take down the system by camping next to it.  Those smelly, intimidating trespassers resembled a ten-year-old’s club rather than a serious group of people trying to affect change. 

The problem with them isn't their message that the rich are too rich.  The rich are too rich.  There are people who own more than they’ll ever need.  They are destructively rich.  They are Kardashian rich.  That’s my new word for ostentatious, arrogance, and tacky with a little fear of contraction aftertaste:  Kardashian.  

They’re too rich.  Dad has a plane company so the family gets a television show that has been going on forever and has never had any reality in it.

Too much money has been destructive to so many.  Country clubs have turned into yacht clubs, have turned into living in a building you own club.  Silver has turned into gold, into platinum.  Rubies were traded in on diamonds and now diamonds are so passay that they’re becoming bigger and bigger and now they’re coming in different colors.  The well-adjusted super-rich is the one with a good PR team.

The problem with the message is that it went to the wrong people.  The message was some people have too much money and we should take it from them.  The message should have been some people have too much money and they should try giving some of it away. 

Now wait one second you think you’re free.  You say I've never owned a building and I've never checked my bank to see if I could afford a trip to space.  You think you’re off the hook because you didn't have to build a bigger garage for your huge collection of cars.  Think again.

You semi-rich person, you may be too rich.  You may have too much stuff.  You may have eaten Spaghettios twice last week and still have been too rich.  Your paycheck may want to argue but I’ll win because I’m a human and can talk and so the pay check won’t be able to argue.

You may be late paying the power man.  You may be late paying the water bill.  You may be just on the verge and yet you, I, we all might have too much stuff and be too rich.  I’m not talking about how we’re the first world and our poorest people are richer than 95% of the rest of the world give or take a percent.  I’m talking about the possibility that you may be living a satisfied life.

Ecclesiasticus 18:30-19:3

³⁰ Do not be governed by your passions, restrain your desires.

³¹ If you allow yourself to satisfy your desires, this will make you the laughing-stock of your enemies.

³² Do not indulge in luxurious living; do not get involved in such society.

³³ Do not beggar yourself by banqueting on credit when there is nothing in your pocket.

19¹ A drunken workman will never grow rich, and one who makes light of small matters will gradually sink.

² Wine and women corrupt intelligent men, the customer of whores loses all sense of shame.

³ Grubs and worms will have him as their legacy, and the man who knows no shame will lose his life.

This is how Ramen noodles and a can of veggies and maybe a little bit of spam all mixed together can be too much.  He’s right, this Jesus, that opulence has a great psychological price that has to be paid.  He doesn’t seem to go far enough though.  It is the fulfillment of desires that makes you weak.  You got a special place you go to in the park every Thursday and eat a homemade bologna sandwich?  Take a few weeks off.  Do you let yourself get whatever you want at the dollar store thinking that here is where you can splurge?  Go in with a hard limit on four things, or three, or one.  Do you watch soaps and thinks it’s your guilty pleasure but it’s okay because you’re on the treadmill while you watch?  Take a week off.  Read a little on the treadmill.  Are you addicted to the treadmill?  Take a week off. 

Whatever you’re addicted to, take a week off.  It is your desires that trap you and ensnare you.  It is your routine that makes you less free.

In the interest of full disclosure, this one’s tough for me.  I like a lot of little habits.  And I love cheap stuff.  I like getting my money’s worth.  I like watching too much TV.  I think I earn a break from life after working a couple of 14-hour days.  I bargain with myself saying (Thinking them, not saying them out loud; I’m not a crazy person.) things like, “I can afford it.  I have earned it.  I’m worth it.  Why not?”  But are those the questions one should ask? 

Try asking your friends and family what you’re addicted to if you dare and take some time off.  It’s scary.  It may even be something good for you.  Take a break from your desires.

If you don’t want to do that then at least ask some different questions than the ones listed above.  Ask yourself if you need it or just want it, not CAN you use it.  Don’t ask if you’re worth it but ask what you could be worth without it.  Ask yourself what you've wanted to do all your life that you never got around to doing, this desire might be in the way.  Don’t go sit under a lotus tree and wait for desire to die inside you.  Become a detective get the facts quick and then attack your desires.

You know Jesus, the one who was the son of God, not the one who wrote this book.  Well Jesus asked some people to give all they have to the poor and follow him.  He wasn't saying that’s a universal prescription but he was recommending it to so with dire prognoses.  Are you one that he wants all of?  Yes.  Are you one that gives him all that you desire?  Probably not.  Don’t worry, you’re in good company.

And for that .0001 percent out there, I’m not going to take your stuff but an accounting of what you did with it is going to be taken from you and Woe to you on that day if your desires have run amok.  To you who can do great things like buy yourself a helipad, please consider that what you have doesn't have to belong to you.  Please believe that ‘tis better to give than to receive.’

Words are a Balm

Once upon a time someone said something to you and you felt glorious. 

One time my grandmother said I was more well-read than her.  This is more amazing when you meet the woman.  She was a Librarian at a school and now she volunteers at a library annex.  Once a week she takes her cloth book bag that in a simpler time would be called a nap sack and she fills it up with pulp fiction.  Mysteries and cop dramas all, and I mean all make it into her bag.  She’s read everybody who’s anybody.  She could put away the history of the Oprah book club in a couple months.  She reads and reads and reads and because my tastes are little more eclectic she laid that whopper on me.  It made me feel like the word compliment was all of a sudden out of style.

One time a man who is known as God Jr. because of his encyclopedic knowledge of the scriptures read my book.  He said, according to his wife, mid-read, “Drew is a better writer than me.”  This man who had written a thousand theological treatises found my literature not-wanting.  He had written a book and had alongside of a healthy sense of arrogance and hubris made the judgment that I was good at writing.  He said that I had a message, a voice.  The word compliment just doesn’t do it. 

Someone has told me I looked handsome.  Someone has told me that I’m smart.  Someone has tried to explain that the crazy stuff I say really makes them feel less crazy.  Someone has complimented my shoes and hat and pen-in-my-hat.  I’ve been told I look like Tom Cruise and Matt LeBlanc because I guess to Asians WE all look the same.  Compliments can be ho hum.  Compliments can make you think that people are messing with you.  Telling the whale that gray makes them look slim; they know is just a veiled insult.  Telling the squirrel that a lot of chicks like them because they’re little is wrong because it’s just so condescending.  Telling the rat that it’s industrious for getting in the trash isn’t a mercy it’s fake sincerity and that’s just insulting.

¹⁵ My child, do not temper your favours with blame nor any of your gifts with words that hurt.

¹⁶ Does not dew relieve the heat? In the same way a word is worth more than a gift.

¹⁷ Why surely, a word is better than a good present, but a generous person is ready with both.

¹⁸ A fool will offer nothing but insult, and a grudging gift makes the eyes smart.

Here’s a special passage you don’t have to think too hard about to KNOW it’s true.  Like these two compliments I’ve mentioned I’m sure there are some hum-dingers that you’ve tucked away into your good things about you bank.  I know that there is something that you remember so that when Peter demands a reckoning at the pearly gates, you’ll be ready.  So-and-So said I was blah blah blah.  It won’t work, but you’re cataloging the good stuff anyway for fear of the Bad and the Ugly.

This blog started because I wanted to spend a little extra time paying attention to wisdom.  I haven’t been doing a good job posting because, I guess, I haven’t been paying attention to wisdom.  I’ll try to remedy that situation soon.  For now, why don’t you think of 10 really good compliments to pay someone? 

Rules for Compliments:

1      - Pick your significant other.  Duh.

2      - Try to pick very few or your closets and most loved.  (Add them to the completed list of ten if you feel you should complement them more.)

3      - Do not decide on nice things to say and pigeon hole your list into those compliments.  (Design a perfectly tailored compliment for each person on your list.)

4      - Choose something based on their character or their God-given ability.  (Don’t tell someone they always know what to wear.)

5      - Give it to someone who needs it.  (I don’t want you to tweet how Lebron James is good at basketball.  He knows.   Trust me; he knows. 

Remember this is about making you wiser not making the world a better place.  While this has the opportunity to improve your relationships with friends, acquaintances, and family its purpose is to help you grow in wisdom.  And how does this do that, you ask?  I’m not sure that I’m not fully invested in the first benefit.  If you however, wanted another reason to believe that this is good for you rather than just other people, nay even the rest of the whole world.  If the term, ‘pay it forward’ is no longer enough, maybe this will help.

Wisdom is knowledge that is used to an end.  And watching for the really valuable stuff in the lives of others is going to teach you about them.  Learn what a woman wants to hear and say it for crying out loud.  Christ is a great example of wisdom coming from watching people.  Christ is a great example of telling people what they needed to hear not what they wanted to hear.  Christ is an example of omni-everything made flesh and you’ll find him among the people giving them great compliments like, ‘You can follow me.’  ‘You can be reborn.’  ‘You can meet God.’  ‘You are perfectly crafted, the handiwork of the creator of the heavens and earth.’  ‘I love you so much that I’d lay down my life for you.’

Of course I know the making the world a better place would be good enough reason to compliment others but to actually follow in the footsteps of Christ Jesus while he follows the advice of this Jesus in Chapter 18.

An Emaciated Mercy

I've been going to a small church for a couple of weeks.  I wanted to go to a church nearby my house.  I feel like it's a negative thing to travel far and wide to get to a church that’s just right for me.  It's not a sin or anything but I felt that if I was looking for a church that was just right for me then I was looking for a church for the wrong reason.  There is faith and hope needed in every corner of the world after all.  I wanted to be useful where I went to church, so a smallish church.  I wanted to be able to go there anytime so nearby.  I like communion every Sunday and I choose accordingly. 

The church that I choose will remain unnamed.  They are driving me off.  I want to be an instrument (St. Francis) but can God use me in this place so bereft of grace to work hope back into dry bones?

There I sit in the pews and I hope someone will engage me in conversation so I can give them a piece of my mind, but that may not help.  How will a bunch of crusty old fuddy duddies listen to what I have to say?  If I have the boldness that God commands and exhorts in Joshua will they have ears to hear what the spirit says to the churches?

What is their soul crushing, joy sucking message?  You can’t sin.  This church seems like a relic in this era.  Most churches are too far on the other end of the pendulum.  They are too grace filled???  Nothing matters, but your faith and love.  I have a message for them too but this church, flying in the face of humanity and history expects true perfection after Christ’s forgiveness. 

What arrogant rubes?  It brings to mind this passage from the 17^th chapter of Ecclesiasticus.  Yes, there is a chance to leave sin behind every day, but there is power in our weakness.  Praise God for his mercy he lavishes it on all who turn towards him.   

25 Return to the LORD and renounce your sins, plead before his face, stop offending him.

26 Come back to the Most High, turn away from iniquity and hold all that is foul in abhorrence.

27 Who is going to praise the Most High in Sheol if we do not glorify him while we are alive?

28 The dead can praise no more than those who do not exist, only those with life and health can praise the Lord.

29 How great is the mercy of the Lord, his pardon for those who turn to him!

30 For we cannot have everything, human beings are not immortal.

31 What is brighter than the sun? And yet it fades. Flesh and blood think of nothing but evil.

32 He surveys the armies of the lofty sky, and all of us are only dust and ashes.

I think that modern Jews sort of believe that their good and bad deeds are going to be weighed at the end of the world.  They believe that God has mercy and will give mercy to those who seek it, those who were close to even.  That’s probably a little obtuse version of it.  We Christians sort of believe that too; just that Christ Jesus is the tool by which we receive grace.

So too, back in the times of this Jesus after the return from Babylon and Persia that they believed that there is power in being sorry.  There may be more power in being sorry than having nothing to be sorry about.  After all, how boring would creation have been if there were nothing but greatness?  If Earth was populated by giants of intellect and morality Jesus, son of David would have been a blip in history and no one would have put up with your awful B.S.  If everyone was good enough there’d be no beautiful choice, no reaching up from the bottom that society and humans hit.  There’s no greatness if there’s nothing but greatness.

This little church believes that you’re going to give an account for what you believe and do.  This church’s preacher starts every sermon with the specific albeit frightening assertion that we will all be on the hook for what we’ve done.  This is, basically, a gospel-less gospel.  This is a Church of Christ where Christ doesn’t make sense.  This is a salvation without a savior. 

But we believe that God looks down on you, with your foibles and quirks, and loves you.  Sometimes he loves you in spite of your faithlessness.  Sometimes because of your broken spiritual wings.  He loves the lame, the frightened, the meek, the week, the sad, and the lonely.  “Man cannot have everything.  Flesh and blood think of nothing but evil.” But God… 

I don’t know where you are on the pendulum of God’s grace.  Somewhere all the way over towards God’s demand for works.  Faith without works is dead of course.  Maybe you’re a figurative member of this church and are hoping to get a ticket into heaven without using Christ as your only ticket in.  Maybe you’re in a church or in a place in your life where you think God is so grace-filled, he really doesn’t care how you behave.  You may think hippie faith is the answer to the world’s problems.  Wherever you are on the spectrum; spend a day on the other side. 

For the fans of James spend a day contemplating and meditating that, “It is the gift of God so that no man may boast.”

For the Pauline lovers maybe you should spend a couple of hours a day or a whole week trying to turn towards God again.  Let’s strive for faithful observance because if you don’t have proofs of faith then your faith is shallow and even the demons have faith in God.

Because Sometimes There's More Truth in a Lie.

24 Lying is an ugly blot on anyone, and ever on the lips of the undisciplined.

25 A thief is preferable to an inveterate liar, but both are heading for ruin.

26 Lying is an abominable habit, the liar's disgrace lasts for ever.

I don't know if anyone has ever told you, but truth is malleable.  Don't know what I'm talking about?  When is the last time you heard someone hedge something they said?  "I had no knowledge," that means you told someone not to tell you.  Mayor Ford in Toronto said he didn't believe there was video of him smoking crack.  He failed to say that he didn't smoke crack.  Politicians do this a lot.  They've raised it to an art form, haven't they?  Like they think they can say they didn't pay someone money for sex because someone else paid.  

If a lie like that is malleable can truth be as well?  Truth.  They say truth is elusive.  They say to get to the bottom of things is the only place you can find good truth.  It is as if you have to break open a truth peanut to get to the actual truth.  

Still there are all those questions women ask their men about whether they look fat in this dress, or if they'd still love her if she was terribly disfigured in an accident.  Truth maybe frightening.  Look yourself in the mirror and ask yourself if this place in life is where you want to be.  Be honest.  Was that the right job, degree, city, house, car, church?  Should I wear a bob, ladies?  Should men wear a mustache, sideburns?  It's okay, maybe even healthy to have some honesty about not being completely happy. 

Now look in that same mirror and beware...too much honesty can be bad too.  When you start looking for that ingredient that you left out maybe you start thinking about a whole new recipe.  You haven't been happy with this car so you get a new one.  You've never liked this chin; let's get a new one.  You hate your wife's nose hair; buy her a nose hair trimmer before you get a new girlfriend.  I think Oscar Wilde said in the Importance of Being Ernest, to keep your eyes wide open when looking for a spouse and half shut when you've found one.  Another way to say that is, seek truth but not too much.

Here comes Jesus II talking about truth and he wants to boil it down to false witness.  But, 'the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth,' isn't always the truth.  I said you look bookish.  To me that is a good thing.  To you that isn't a good thing.  I said I hate it when you do that.  You thought I said I hate you when you do that.  I asked what's happening with this sit. as an abbreviation for situation; you thought I said sh**.  

Jesus II and the ten commandments seem to have this view of lying that is very pigeon-holed.  Maybe that's a good thing.  One thing is clear is that we think it's worse than theft.  Lying is abominable.  It lasts forever.  It is a nasty discharge on your face and it will not go away.  It is an open sore that you can't put a bandage on.  I'd rather enjoy the company of a person who punches me in the face than lies constantly.  Liars...well...they're collectively the Grinch.  

James points this out too.  And I think he has a more sensitive view about the shackles of truth.  He knows that a gossiping tongue telling the truth is still dishonest.  He knows that a verbal attack on the lips can trump a violent one on the fists.

Jesus, the best one, tells us not to make pledges or promises but to let our yeses be yes and our nos be no.  I think he is clearly trying to push away the infantile statements about innocence that a politician may keep on hand.  I think he seeks a person who is actively in search of the truth.  After all truth is more than facts.  Facts can sometimes lie, if you haven't heard.  

Truth is...well it's God.  It is love and in love their can be no dishonesty.  Whether it is true or not.  You ever think about that?  God will one day make you perfect, a lie that all creation is waiting for, for the sons and daughters of God to be revealed.    A substitute is making us clean so that we may be what we aren't and have what we haven't earned.  Our nature being with God is an unholy lie but Christ is the way and the...what...the truth and the life.  Isn't that the answer Christ gave Pilate when he asked what truth was?  The answer was Christ standing before him soon to be lifted up. Truth about to be killed for something he was innocent of...a lie.  Truth traded in for a lie but God's love makes it truth.

Welcome to the World

22 Have you cattle? Look after them; if they are making you a profit, keep them.

23 Have you children? Educate them, from childhood make them bow the neck.

24 Have you daughters? Take care of their bodies, but do not be over-indulgent.

25 Marry a daughter off, and you have finished a great work; but give her to a man of sense.

26 Have you a wife to your liking? Do not turn her out; but if you do not love her, never trust her.

How pertinent is it that I'm writing a blog about raising a daughter when my sister has just hours ago given birth to her first little girl?  I'm pretty stoked.  I love having niephews.  Yes that's a word, Spell Checker.  I love all the ones I've had so far.  I love Seren Eclaire, and Everrito, and Caediboo, and Williamino, and Murphy the Mess, and JDOC, and Luke-ee (Not sure how to spell this.  It seemed more creative when I said it than when I wrote it.  It sounds like, "Follow Duke-ee," from a single episode of a Gummie Bears Cartoon.).  Here, into the fray comes...I'm not sure I'm allowed to tell the world.  I've been sworn to secrecy.  

So it's pertinent.  But is it too presumptuous?  Probably.  But I hope I'm not making up the wisdom that I'm eschewing.  I hope I'm trying to give a sense of this Jesus' stuff.  I hope I'm introducing you, not berating you with wisdom.  After all wisdom has a still, kind, sweet voice.  Yes, sometimes she stands on the street corners and yells when no one can hear her.  But the voice of wisdom is a soft yell.  She shouts with a bedroom voice.  

Now let me just tell you that I think verse 26 needs a little less chauvinism and maybe mix in a little less crazy but hey I've never been married.  Plus, I wish he hadn't compared raising children to the raising of cattle.  Then again, I'm not a parent.  Maybe raising a kid is like raising a kid...get it?  Young goats are called kids, right?  Is that right?  I'm going to Google it.  Yep.  I was right.  Still a dumb joke, though, I know.  Anyways, I always give parents the same advice about how to raise a child.  One, brand them on their lower back not their thigh.  Two, don't force them to potty train.  I think they should beg to learn the ways of the toilet about the time they're ready for fourth grade.

So since I obviously have no idea what to say to parents about raising a child lets see what Jesus II has to say.  One, teach them so that they will profit you.  Two, keep the goal in mind.  

I hope I'm not stepping on any toes but your children will one day be good for you.  I'm not talking about that moment when they pop out and your heart feels good.  I'm not talking about them letting you move in when you're a hundred.  While this was part of the message then; it's more now.  Children are part of you becoming a better adult.  They refine your thinking.  They teach you grace and patience.  They make you smarter and if you're wise you can learn from their wisdom later in life.  They are a bread basket of lessons.  Take and eat.  The lessons...don't eat the babies.  Sit down and make a list of the things you've learned about people from watching your kid.  How do you want to be more like a child?  Are you learning anything through them?  Start paying more attention, you should be learning a great deal.  They are your teachers as you are theirs.

And parent with the end in mind.  I know we get this message when starting to look for a job, or train for a marathon, or bake cookies.  However, do we need this advice when we talk about child raising?  I'm not saying pressure them to become a Quarterback.  I'm saying that there are traits that you think they'll need.  There are ways that you wish you were raised differently.  Don't be flippant about the things that will make your baby into an adult the world can be proud of and God can really use.  Don't put items on the list like, "I want my baby to forgive."  That's to simple and amorphous.  How will you get them to forgive?  "I want my baby to climb every mountain," look! this isn't a Miley Cyrus song(get it?) this is your child's life.  How about this one.  "I want my child to play an instrument because that kind of determination and hard work will serve her in every endeavor and that talent is something almost every adult wishes they procured growing up."  That's parenting with the end in mind.  

"I want my kid to excel in all subjects.  If he can't, then I want him to try thoroughly and never give up because you don't have to excel in school to excel in life but you can't give up."  That's parenting with the end in mind.  Some parents want their kid to be spiritual but don't have the sense to purse spirituality.  Some parents want their kid to read but they don't read enough to them.  That's not parenting with the end in mind.

In the comments feel free to leave bad advice for parents, as a joke.  Make sure it's funny.  In private make a list of the traits you want your kid to have and some ways you can help them achieve them.  If you don't trust yourself (in conjunction with your spouse), have a trusted friend look over your list and make sure you're not putting too much pressure on your kids.  Make sure that you're not trying to live your life again through them.  We've seen that on enough t.v. dramas.